One day ima gonna Malta to bigga hotel.
Ina morning I go down to eat breakfast.

I tella waitress I wanna two pissis toast.
She brings me only one piss.
I tella her I want two piss.
She say go to the toilet.
I say, you no understand, I wanna piss onna my plate.
She say, you better no piss onna plate, you sonna ma bitch.
I don't even know the lady and she call me sonna ma bitch.

Later I go to eat at the bigga restaurant.
The waitress brings me a spoon and knife but no fock.
I tella her I wanna fock.
She tell me everyone wanna fock.
I tell her you no understand.
I wanna fock on the table.
She say, you better not fock on the table, you sonna ma bitch.

So I go back to my room inna hotel and there is no shits onna my bed.
Call the manager and tella him I wanna shit.
He tell me to go to toilet.
I say you no understand. I wanna shit on my bed.
He say you better not shit onna bed, you sonna ma bitch.

I go to the checkout and the man at the desk say: "Peace on you".
I say piss on you too, you sonna ma bitch, I gonna back to Italy...

ALL START IS HEAVY !
- Aller Anfang ist schwer !

THE FAR LOOKING TOWER
- Der Fernsehturm

PIG STRONG !
- Saustark !

THE UMBRELLA POWER
- Die Schirmherrschaft

TO WINDOW
- fenstern

THE BYCICLE STEAMER
- Der Raddampfer

THE FLIPPING WEEKS
- Die Flitterwochen

THE SEA YOUNG WOMAN
- Die Seejungfrau

THE DUST BELL
- Die Dunstglocke

THANKS FOR THE AFTERQUESTION
- "Danke für die Nachfrage"

JACK LOOK-IN-THE-AIR
- Hans guck in die Luft

THE CHARACTERTRAIN
- Der Charakterzug

SKIN OFF !
- Haut ab !

THE ROLLING SUPER-MARKET
- Der Rolladen

IT IS ME SAUSAGE !
- Es ist mir Wurst !

THE THROUGH-HOLDING-MONEY
- Das Durchhaltevermögen

THE TREE COLLEGE
- Die Baumschule

THE BUSINESS SEX
- Der Berufsverkehr

YOUR ENGLISH IS UNDER ALL PIG !
- Dein Englich ist unter aller Sau !

THE DARLING COLOR
- Die Lieblingsfarbe

THE BABYSITTER
- Der Babystuhl

THE STRONG RIVER
- Der Starkstrom

THE APPLE-HOLDER-NUMBER
- Die BH-größe

THE CAKE-LIFT
- Der Tortenheber

THERE IS A TRAIN IN MY ROOM
- Es zieht !

THE CIRCLE-HALL
- Der Kreissaal

THE SQUARE-SLIPPER
- Quadratlatschen

THE GO SIT
- Das Gesetz

THE PEOPLE-CAR-FACTORY
- Das VW-Werk

YOU GO ME ON THE ALARM-CLOCK !
- Du gehst mir auf den Wecker!

THE ILL-CASH-BOX
- Die Krankenkasse

THE COUNTRY-PEACE-BREAK
- Landfriedensbruch

YOU CAN SAY YOU TO ME!
- Sie können du zu mir sagen

THE FALLING UMBRELLA JUMPER
- Der Fallschirmspringer

LIES HAVE SHORT LEGS
- Lügen haben kurze Beine

PASSPORT OPEN
- Pass auf !

CHEERIO MEALTIME !
- Prost Mahlzeit !

MY DEAR MISTER SINGING CLUB
- Mein lieber Herr Gesangsverein

THE PAY-ATTENTION-AND LOCK-COMPANY
- Die Wach und Schließgesellschaft

THE HIGH-TIME-DUO
- Das Hochzeitspaar

THE HEAD-STONE-STRIP
- Das Kopfsteinpflaster

THE AFTER BEAT FACTORY
- Das Nachschlagewerk

THE OVERSITTER
- Der Dolmetscher

AT THE APPLE OF NATURE
- Am Busen der Natur

THE GREEN-INVESTMENT
- Die Grünanlage

THE SPOT-LIGHT-FEVER
- Das Lampenfieber

THE FARMERS EARLY-PIECE
- Das Bauernfrühstück

THE JUMPING COMPANY
- Der Turnverein

HIGHATTENTIONFULL MILLER
- Hochachtungsvoll Müller

THE WATER COCK
- Der Wasserhahn

THE CHICKEN EYE
- das Hühnerauge

THE CRY-TEST
- Die Weinprobe

THE DINNER FOR ONE
- Der Einheitsfraß

TIME-WORDS
- Zeitwörter

TO SHINE SOMEONE HOME
- Jemanden Heimleuchten

TO RASP SWEET-WOOD
- Süßholzraspeln

TO FALL INSIDE
- Reinfallen

TO SIT AFTER
- Nachsitzen

LIVING MIDDLE-BUSINES
- Lebensmittelgeschäft

THE STEP-AWAY
- Der Fortschritt

ONE-WALL-FREE
- Einwandfrei

THE KEY OF MILITARY
- Schlüsselbund

THE NOSE-LEG-BREAK
- Der Nasenbeinbruch

THE SMOKE BEHIND
- Die Zigarette danach

FILMCITY-SWINGER
- Hollywoodschaukel

THE NECK-CUTTER
- Der Halsabschneider

I HAVE THE FACE FULL !
- Ich habe die Schnauze voll !

ARM-LIGHTER
- Armleuchter

THE FARMERS-CATCH
- Bauernfängerei

MONKEY-SHARP
- Affengeil

THE DONKEY-BRIDGE
- Die Eselsbrücke

THE REASON PIECE
- Das Grundstück

THE BIG PARENTS
- Die Großeltern

MUCHEASY
- vielleicht

SLIPPER-JAW
- Latschenkiefer

THE TUBE-SPARROW
- Der Rohrspatz

THE SHOPPING-GENTLEMAN
- Der Geschäftsmann

THE DO-NOT-GOOD
- Der Tunichtgut

THE BETTERNOWER
- Der Besserwisser

THE WAITER-SCHOOL
- Die Oberschule

THE HIGH-GRILL
- Der Hochofen

STATIONS-SISTER
- Stationsschwester

HAIR-EXACT
- Haargenau

THE WINDY-KISS
- Der Luftikus

THE DARK-NUMBER
- Die Dunkelziffer

THE FINGER-TOP-FEELING
- Das Fingerspitzengefühl

THE HIGH-STRESS-PIPLINE
- Die Hochspannungsleitung

THE LUCKY-MUSHROOM
- Der Glückspilz

THE BUBBLE-INFEKTION
- Die Blasenentzündung

THE RUNNING PASSPORT
- Der Laufpaß

THE BOTTLE-TRAIN
- Der Flaschenzug

THE LIVING-PARTY
- Die Wohngemeinschaft

THE MIDDLE-OF-THE-BACKSIDE
- Der Poposcheitel

THE BIRD-FARMER
- Der Vogelbauer

THE SHIT-FORK
- Die Mistgabel

THE POWER-SOUP
- Kraftbrühe

THE LIVING-ARTIST
- Der Lebenskünstler

THE MILITARY-FOLDING-TROUSER
- Die Bundfaltenhose

THE SWINGING-SHIP-STOPPER
- Der Schiffschaukelbremser

PRESS-AIR-BOTTLES
- Pressluftflaschen

THE POCKET-STEALER
- Der Taschendieb

JESUS MAKES A TRIP TO HEAVEN
- Christi Himmelfahrt

THE BABY-TOILET
- Die Windel

THE SECOND-HAND-BIRTHDAY
- Die Wiedergeburt

THE BOSS OF THE PUBS
- Der Wirtschaftsminister

LOOPING-TREE
- Purzelbaum

SPACE-TIME-FIT
- Allzeit bereit

THE BLOWIN-CHAPPEL
- Die Blaskapelle

FLOWER-POWER
- Blumendünger

THE APPLE-SWIMMER
- Der Brustschwimmer

BLACK-OUTSTANDING
- Negeraufstand

DOWN-LOOKING-SHIP
- Unterseeboot

THE BABY-AIRLINES
- Der Klapperstorch

THE PICTURE-PIPELINE
- Die Bildröhre

THE PLAYBOYS-TRAIN
- Der Spielmannszug

THE BRANDY-NOSE
- Die Schnapsnase

THE COFFEE-SENTENCE
- Der Kaffeesatz

THE CLEVER-MOUNTAINER
- Der Schlauberger

I ONLY UNDERSTAND RAILWAY-STATION
- Ich verstehe immer nur Bahnhof

YELLOWMANIA
- Gelbsucht

SO SLOWLY BUT SURELY
- So langsam aber sicher

I LAUGH ME A BRANCH
- Ich lach mir 'nen Ast

HIGH-GERMAN
- Hochdeutsch

WOODEYE BE CAREFULL
- Holzauge sei wachsam

TAKE YOURSELF IN EIGHT
- Nimm dich in acht

ME SMELLS
- Mir stinkt's

SEX-CLUB
- Vehrkehrsverein

LETTER-SEX
- Briefverkehr

AIR-SEX-COMPANY
- Luftfahrtsgesellschaft

CITY-SEX
- Stadtverkehr

KICK-SEX
- Stoßverkehr

CIRCLE-SEX
- Kreisverkehr

SEX-LIGHT
- Verkehrsampel

QUICK-SEX-ROAD
- Schnellverkehrsstraße

LEFT/RIGHT-SEX
- Links/Rechts-Verkehr

THE AIR-PILLOW-BOAT
- Luftkissenboot

TO LOOK INTO THE PIPELINE
- In die Röhre gucken

ROOM-MAN
- Zimmermann

THE STRIPTEASE-TABLE

- der Ausziehtisch

• When there's only one other person in the elvator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
  
  
• Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
  
  
• Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
  
  
• Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.
  
  
• Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
  
  
• Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
  
  
• Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
  
  
• Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an apointment.
  
  
• Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.
  
  
• Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.
  
  
• Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
  
  
• Ask, "Did you feel that?"
  
  
• Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
  
  
• When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"
  
  
• Swat at flies that don't exist.
  
  
• Tell people that you can see their aura.
  
  
• Call out, "Group Hig!"and then enforce it.
  
  
• Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"
  
  
• Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
  
  
• Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
  
  
• Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
  
  
• Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.
  
  
• Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.
  
  
• Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
  
  
• Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".
  
  
• Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passnegers, "This is MY personal space!"